If Today Was Your Last Day
by theherbflower
Summary: Roy Mustang didnt think too much upon what tomorrow would bring. Sure he wanted to be Fuhrer one day, that is true. And only with some helpful words from Maes Hughes, would he see the light that was Riza Hawkeye.


If Tomorrow Was Too Late  
Fullmetal Alchemist  
Verse: Manga.  
By: herb3  
Rating: T (for swearing)  
Disclaimer: I am not Hiromu Arakawa so I can claim ownership for  
nothing you will read about in the story.  
AN: A one shot that came to me like a suffocating fish comes to water.

* * *

Roy Mustang was, as much as I hated to even think the abomination... Cute. Roy Mustang was as cute as a god damned button. There he sat his head down on his desk in protest of the mountain of paperwork surrounding him. He had this cute as pout on his face that I am quite certain is on purpose. There was nothing more that I wanted to do then marching myself over there and kiss that damn pout off his handsome face and out of his life. It was however unfortunate that if I were to ever act upon such emotions, I would probably be discharged with the possible added bonus of being court marshaled and then I wouldn't be able to protect him so that he would become führer. I bet you that someone out there that was calling all the shots in this universe was laughing his fucking little head off. Bastard.

"Lieutenant..." he whined in an even more fucking adorable voice

"Why do we have to do all this stupid paperwork?"

"Well sir, if you would do it a head of time when I actually give it too you I am sure you wouldn't have this problem."

"I didn't sign up for this shit. " he sighed "What good is a Flame Alchemist if he's locked up in a room filling out useless paperwork."

"One the higher ups don't have to worry about sir."

"Well that's just great." he huffed folding his arms across his chest irritably. "It's a good thing that I don't actually have a life then."

"Sir with all due respect, please just finish your damn work. The longer you complain about it the longer it will take you to actually finish so that you can go home."

"Uhh... " he pouted again reminding me very much of a child who's mother took away his favorite candy "Alright Lieutenant Hawkeye. I'll finish the damn paperwork."

And he was true to that statement, he finished every piece of paper that was pilled on his desk. For a long while the only sound that could be heard from our office was the scratching sound of pens on paper. It was at one point of the afternoon that I found Colonel Mustang glaring down at a document with contempt and malice. I had been looking up from my work to find the stapler when I noticed his death glares to the offending piece of paper. I watched his little staring match with the document for a good five minutes before I said something to break his staring contest. For how long he kept up this before I noticed his glaring match I do not know.

"Colonel Mustang. Why are you glaring at the paper?" he looked up at me with malice shining in his eyes

"Its a letter from Hughes in central. " he seethed out before resuming his death glares at the letter.

"Well that can't be too bad then right?" I asked softly while stapling the report that I had been reading. "I thought you and the Lieutenant Colonel were good friends?"

"That's not it Hawkeye." he growled out. "My brainless friend wrote me a four foot letter on all the reasons to find a wife." It took some convincing myself to not laugh.

"Well Sir could it be that the Lieutenant Colonel just worries about you?" I asked softly "After all he can't be here to watch over you so he just wants to make sure someone else does."

"But there is someone who watches over me already. He just doesn't seem to get it." he groaned "I just wish he would stop reminding me about the wife thing."

"He just cares sir." I told him while rising from my seat to file the report. "I am glad that you have someone Sir. Perhaps you should tell the Lieutenant Colonel."

He surveyed me for a few moments with an odd wistful expression on his face. If I had thought the pouting Colonel Mustang was cute, then the wistful Colonel Mustang was down right adorable. He had this sincere look on his face that would make any normal woman fall to her knees and squeal like a love struck school girl. It took every thing In my power to keep walking and file that damn report. Despite the fact that  
I've known him practically my whole life, this was the first time I have ever wanted to peruse something with him that wasn't either strictly business or in a friendly platonic manner.

"No Maes will only make matters worse somehow"

"How is that possible sir? I mean after all if you care about whomever it is that is watching over you, wouldn't you want the Lieutenant Colonel to know?"

"Of course I do. It's just complicated." he sighed tossing the letter into the trash bin. "Its just something that I've just come to terms with recently. I'm just not ready for Maes to tell me that he told me so."

"Then the Lieutenant Colonel already knows."

"Well he only knows that he wants it that way." he flipped another paper into the trash bin. "And I only know that I want it that way too." he sighed.

It was at that moment that I felt a wave of jealousy like I've never felt before in my life for this person. Did that mean that I loved him? I mean he has been my friend since I was a young girl. I always seen him as my friend; my brother. But at the moment the only feelings I was having for him were of a not so platonic source. Friends don't look at friends and want to kiss the other senseless. And siblings sure as hell don't have those feelings either.

"Well Sir, if you want it that way there is no use in not telling the Lieutenant Colonel about this person that you care about and obviously cares about you."

"Tell me Hawkeye. Remember the time you wanted to learn how to ice skate and begged me to teach you?" he asked while leaning back in his chair, the same wistful expression on his face. "You were what ten "

"Yes Sir. I remember. You kept telling me no because the ice on the lake outside looked too thin." I responded as I walked from the filing cabinet back to my desk. "And I kept complaining about how all you wanted to do was play with your fire because you were a stupid pyromaniac."

"Then do you remember telling me to stuff it that you'd teach yourself."

"Yes Sir."

"Then you went outside to the lake all by yourself so that you could teach yourself how to ice skate."

"Yes Sir." I snapped slightly wondering where the hell he was going with this old memory. "I remember."

"And you fell into the lake because the ice was too thin and had to be saved by me due to me following after your little stubborn face."

"What does this have to do with the Lieutenant Colonel and this person you care about?"

"Well it does. Remember when I pulled you out dripping wet and ice cold."

"Colonel Mustang. Get on with whatever your trying to say." I snapped all flustered at the embarrassing memory.

"Remember when I told you 'I told you so' Hawkeye." he grinned "And you punched me and told me to stuff it you pompous jerk."

"Yeah. What about it."

"Remember how mad you were at hearing that only because I was right and you were wrong. Well that's what it will be like If I tell Maes."

"It can't be that bad."

"Yes Riza. It can" he sighed rubbing his head with his let hand. "I love him like a brother and therefore do not want to torch him when he laughs, sticks his finger in my face and exclaims I told you so."

"I am sure it won't be that bad." I told him while pulling up another report to read. "I'm sure that the Lieutenant Colonel will be happy for you."

"Yeah. I guess your right." he sighed again.

It was then that a pestering knocking sounded on the door before the door was thrown open and the Lieutenant Colonel himself strode onto our office.

"Roy!" he said cheerfully. "Did you get my letter?"

"Yes Maes. Now what brings you to eastern head quarters "

"I just had to come and show you the new photos of Elicia I just got developed yesterday." he pulled out a stack of photographs from his pocket and tossed them at the Colonel. "You should look at all of them."

"I am sure that I will Maes."

"How are you Lieutenant Hawkeye?" Maes Hughes asked me brightly. "Hope Roy hasn't been overworking you?"

"Of course not sir." I told him softly before beginning to read the report so that I could get my mind off of whoever the Colonel was so taken with.

"So have you thought about the wife thing? If not boy do I have some news for you. See I passed Lieutenant General Grumman in the hall way and we got to talking about his granddaughter."

I felt my stomach drop. Surely my grandfather wouldn't...

"He thinks she would make you a good wife and you know that marrying a relative of a higher up would be a wise political move."

"Hughes the Lieutenant General has offered his granddaughters hand to me many times and my answer is and has always been the same."

Maybe he knew. Though I don't know how as I've never told him and I doubt my grandfather has either. What if he only seen me as a friend, a sister... But then again of course he did. Heaven help me and these new feelings arising. Stupid Colonel and his adorable pout.

"But Roy..."

"Hughes do you even know who the Lieutenant General's granddaughter is?" Colonel Mustang asked with a heavy sigh. "Because you should know that it's the Lieutenant sitting to your right." he looked over at me silently. "Am I right Hawkeye?"

With a mask that could fool god I nodded.

"Colonel Mustang is correct. Lieutenant General Grumman is my grandfather although I need to speak with him about trying to breed me off now." I said with fake disdain. In reality I don't mind my grandfather caring about me. And maybe he knew secretly that I had feelings for my Colonel before I even I did.

"Oh.. I'm sorry Hawkeye." he smiled at me "My bad."

"Its alright sir, it's not supposed to be known really." I said while standing up. I walked over to the Colonels desk and saluted

"Permission to leave sir?"

Mustang smiled "Permission granted Hawkeye."

And with that I left the room.

* * *

I returned to our office ten minutes later feeling refreshed with a hot mug of spearmint tea. I balanced a couple of new files in one arm and my tea in the other. I reached to open the door but stopped at hearing raised voices.

"Damnit Maes. I swear I don't have feelings other than friendship for Lieutenant Hawkeye." Colonel Mustang shouted "Will you please give it a rest."

"When you admit that you do. I'm telling you that you need to just deal with this. Did you see her face when she waked out of here, she looked near tears."

"She did not look near tears. I've known her since the age of eleven Maes and not once have I seen that girl cry."

"That should mean something then huh? The fact that you telling me that you only will ever see her as she is and never anything more when it's so obvious that she sees you as more then that."

"She does not Maes."

"How do you know that "

"Because Maes, I do"

"Fine maybe your right, but will you at least admit that you have feelings for her. Because Roy I know that you do."

"Why so you can laugh stick your finger in my face and tell me that you told me so? I think not."

I felt my stomach drop for the second time today. Could he?... No it's not possible. He dates super models. Why would he have feelings for me? Simple gun yielding me?

"Roy I'm not going to tell you I told you so. It wasn't so hard to see. I mean have you heard one of your drunken rages?" Hughes laughed "What soberness conceals drunkenness reveals."

"First Lieutenant Hawkeye?" Lieutenant Havoc asked from behind me. "What are you doing?"

"I..." I started feeling more waves of shock wash over me "I don't know."

"Are you feeling well? Your kind of pale..."

"No... I'm feeling..."

"Fine! I admit it then. I'm in love with the girl who shot walnuts at me with a slingshot when she was five; I'm in love with the girl who fell through thin ice when I wouldn't teach her to skate at the age of ten; the girl who didn't even cry when her father died when she was sixteen; the girl who followed me into fucking war Maes, just so that she could protect me; the woman who stands over me with her gun drawn making me do my paperwork every fucking day so that one day I can change is godforsaken country." he yelled.

The shattering sound of porcelain breaking on marble floors could be heard; the hot slosh of tea splashing my crisp navy blue uniform could be seen and by me felt. Havoc stood behind me with his jaw dropped, eyes wide, and arms hanging limp at his sides. The office door flew open and a horror struck Colonel Roy Mustang stood there staring at me.

"Lieutenant Hawkeye I can explain..." he sputtered out "I..."

"Havoc!" Lieutenant Hughes smiled while skipping past me to the Lieutenant behind me. "Lets take a walk." he rushed off with the still stunned chain smoker. And then they were gone.

"Uhh Lieutenant please come inside..." he shifted slightly. I couldn't move though, this had to be some crazy dream because this was just not possible. Roy Mustang was a man who liked to date the most gorgeous of women; the cream of the crop. This had to be a joke, it just couldn't be real. I looked down at the floor to my broken mug that I'd had tea in. I knelt down to pick up the pieces, files still in hand.

"Lieutenant please just come into the office." he sighed pulling me up by my shoulders gently.

I followed him onto the office quietly waiting for this impossible dream to leave my conscience. I put the broken pieces of my tea mug onto the desk and sat down in my chair. I pulled out the files I had brought in and began to read through them. He shut the door and walked over towards me. I looked up at him.

"Riza what you heard was.." I cut him off.

"You don't have to worry sir, I know you only said that stuff to get the Lieutenant Colonel to back off. Really you don't have to explain anything more."

"I... Yeah thanks for understanding Lieutenant." he nodded with a smile on his face.

"Sir it's getting late. Permission to leave for the evening sir?"

He nodded at me before walking over to his desk and sat down in his chair. "Of course Hawkeye."

"Thank you sir, and good evening" I told him before stood up and left the room.

* * *

It was the next day. I walked into headquarters in my normal brisk pace. I picked up the days paperwork and headed to our office on the third floor. I passed Fuery, Falman, Breada, and Havoc already working on their own days work.

"Morning guys" I told them all with a smile as I walked into their workroom outside if our office.

"Morning Hawkeye." Havoc smiled at me lewdly "Hope you and the chief didn't stay up too late working."

"Of course not Havoc. I left just after you and the Lieutenant Colonel did."

"Oh." he seemed put out at that. "Alright."

I walked into the office after that only to find it in it's usual state, empty. I sighed and made my way over to my desk to get started on the days work. Hours passed and the Colonel hadn't been in and I started to worry, usually he'd have called in at least. I walked over to his desk and picked up the phone receiver. I dialed his home phone number. I let it ring at least fifty times before I dropped the receiver into the cradle. I put my coat back on and left headquarters. It was a ten minute walk from headquarters to his apartment. I knocked on the door and waited for him to open up. It took a few minutes for him to get to the door. He was half dressed and smelled heavily of alcohol. He squinted out of the dark apartment at me, he looked drunk as hell.

"Riza?" he asked excitedly "What are you doing here?" he pulled me into a bone crushing hug. "I am so glad that you are here."

"Colonel are you drunk?"

"Am I?" he laughed swaying us back and forth. He pulled back from the hug and looked at me. "I had no idea. Would you like some tea?"

"Err Colonel you weren't at hq today and I came to make sure that you were ok."

"Of course I'm alright Riza you silly." he laughed while pulling me into another hug.

Ok so this is new, what the fuck did he drink? The last time he was like this was Christmas and he had vodka spiked eggnog. And sure enough there lying on the couch was an empty bottle of Bartelby's famous Russian vodka.

"Sir why don't I get you a glass of water?" I asked pulling away from him. "Doesn't that sound good."

"No Riza, I've got to tell you something." he said pulling me back to him. "See yesterday when I got home after lying to you I realized something. See Maes told me something important, and it made me realize Riza! And it was like a big fat hairy book that beamed me upside the head!"

"I'm sure it is Colonel. Now let's go and get some water in you yeah?" the faster I can dilute the alcohol in his bloodstream the better.

"No Riza. It's important that I tell you this!"

"Ok Sir? What is it?"

"Maes told me that each day is a gift and not a given right. Leave no stone unturned and leave you fears behind and try to take the path less traveled by."

"That's nice sir. That's good advice that you should take."

"But Riza that's not all! He asked me if today was my last day, if tomorrow was too late could I have said goodbye to yesterday." he told me in this sincere tone with that same wistful expression on his face. "And Riza I couldn't. Because of you. I lied yesterday. I feel all those things I told Hughes. I do love you."

"I... What?"

"I love you Elizabeth Hawkeye."

"Colonel that's not even funny."

"No Riza, it's true. I just... It's so recent. One day you were my friend who I've known since I was a child and the next you were more then that. It's true, I would never lie to you about this. Riza there have been four women in my life that I've told I love you to. My mother Madame Christmas, my sisters, and you. There is nothing I wouldn't do for you Riza. It just took me this long to realize it."

"Then why'd you get drunk? You do realize that it's past noon don't you."

"It made me realize what a fool I've been."

"Well I have to admit that getting drunk when you realize that your in love with someone is foolish Sir."

"I know. And I'm sorry." he sighed "I'm sorry that I've put you through all this crap; I'm sorry that I make you worry; and I'm sorry that you don't feel the same."

"Who said that I don't Sir? Because I never did or didn't."

"Do you?" he asked looking me straight in the eyes "Do you love me?" In all honesty I don't know. I care about him more then I care about a lot of things, but did that mean I loved him? Who even knows what love is? Did I? Could I go on without him in my life? No I couldn't. If he ever left this world I'd be the next one to follow. I was irrevocably devoted to him, and nothing could or would be able to change that. I was loyal to him, and cared about him something fierce. So maybe I was in love with him. I did have all these new feelings brewing up within me. If only now it was something more akin to a crush or being in like, one day and I'm sure that that day would be one day soon, it would be love.

"I don't know Roy. Love is a strong word."

"Oh." he sighed "I see." he bowed his head

"But what I do know is that if today was my last day and tomorrow was too late, I would only regret not telling you how much I care about you. I would go to the ends of this earth for you; to hell and back if that's what you asked me."

"I'd never ask you to go to hell and back for me silly." he grinned. "But I might ask you something along the lines of could you? Could you ever love me?"

"The answer to that would be simple. Yes. Given time I could fall in love with you." I smiled at him. "Now how about we get you sobered up a little. So you can remember this conversation."

"Oh my Elizabeth." he pulled me closer "There could be no force on earth that could make me forget this day."

"You do realize that no one can know about this right? After all you still have to make it to Führer."

"I know." he told me with a smile as he held me tighter "And then I get to ask you to marry me. Of coarse by then I'll have the frat laws abolished and the mini skirt uniform passed."

"Your not really that drunk at all are you?"

"M'only tipsy. Do you really think I would tell you that I love you drunk?"

"Your evil, you know that right? I can even see the horns sticking up in the back of your head."

"I'll be evil only if your the damsel in distress."

"And then you'll take me back to your lair."

"Good idea." he chuckled before scooping me up off my feet and into his arms "And then I'd take liberties..."

"What are you some crazy ass pirate?"

"Aye. I look for some booty lass. Hence the liberties..."

"What makes you think that I'd let you take liberties? I am armed you know."

"But Riza!" he pouted that damn adorable pout that got me into this stupid mess in the first place. I love that pout.

"Take me to your lair and I might rethink that thought."

He didn't need telling twice.

AN: Nice people review^^ so be nice and do such.  
-Cheers,  
theherbflower

theherbflower at gmail dot com


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